My Little Ponies

Now, it would be mighty easy to expound on Tyra Banks' role in the breeding of these fancy ladies... but we all know Tyra is bald. Always has been.

This is truly magical weavery. Behold.

Tonight's Today

Today's Tonight

music monday

Yeasayer: TIGHTROPE

• no New York dates set; check 'em @ BONNaROO (and everyone else you listen to)

Metric: HELP, I'M ALIVE

• Fantasies out April 14th, tour dates not set.

Chairlift: EVIDENT UTENSIL

• next New York date @ santos party house March 7th

Little Boots: HOT CHIP COVER FEATURING THE TENORI-ON

• missed NY show last week because it was too damn cold to walk to Studio B; look for a show date near you, if you live in Austin.

Glasvegas: GERALDINE

• next USA show @ SXSW; look for New York show dates in March
  

Just Duckie

For once I don't have anything snarky to say on the following topic, because it was genuinely exciting. (don't think I've gone soft, though) I was a dresser at the Duckie Brown show in the tents last Friday, and while I've been backstage at the Mercedes Benz Fashion Week before to do press-type things, actually being involved in the production, under the big top, was such a great experience.

And for those of you who've never been inside the circus, know that the portable johns available are probably nicer than your bathroom at home. Not my bathroom at home, though - there are limits to portable luxury.

One of my little dressing stations:


Lovely fellow dressers. We got there at 10:30 and then just kind of stood around lint-rolling for 3 hours. Not sure why they had us show up so early... The dressing room:
I instructed Blue Steel and they said they only knew Magnum:
There was lots of milling, but not much working:
The ponies at the gate:
praying the free gift at the end of the show isn't the pom pom hat:

It wasn't - it was actually these pretty fabulous Duckie Brown for Florsheim wingtip ankle boots. From the looks of things in the dressing room, though, I hope the boys can trade them on the street for Creatine. Or burgers.

As Cool As Peppermint Ice Cream

Mr. T wants you to be somebody, unless your name is Calvin Klein, Bill Blass, or Gloria Vanderbilt. He also wants you to wear clothes, because otherwise you'll get arrested. Very wise.



I know what you're thinking - WHAT the hell is Mr. T, anyway? Is he a nutjob? An alien? Dutch? Allow me (um...Wikipedia, really) to put dispel these nasty rumors:

-Real name is Laurence Tureaud, from Chicago
-Grew up in housing project with 11 siblings
-Was a military policeman
-Became a bouncer, where "His wearing of gold neck chains and other jewelry was the result of customers losing the items, leaving them behind at the bar/night club after a fight, or being removed from the place. A customer would not have to re-enter or even have to see anyone else again if Mr. T wore their jewelry as he stood out front."
-Eventually the chains took up to an hour to put on.
-The mohawk was inspired by a Mandinka warrior in a National Geographic
-The raps in Mr. T's video "Be Somebody...Or Be Somebody's Fool" were written by IceT...including "Treat Your Mother Right"
-In 1995, he was diagnosed with T-cell lymphoma.
-In 2005, Mr. T stated that he would never wear his chains again, in response to the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina (though he's been spotted with a few chains since)
-He breeds horses

Janice and Donatella, together at last!

I was just perusing Jezebel, and an image they posted of Donatella Versace just, like, slapped me in the face with her resemblance to Ron Perlman in the Beauty and the Beast TV show, in the late 80s. Lookit:










They must have the same special fx makeup artist. Further reserach into darling Dona revealed the internet feels she's been separated at birth a few times...

Eh, maybe:

Definitely not:

OH HELL YEAH:

The Baconator (See also: Bacon Explosion, Redneck Sushi, Arterial Motives)

We accidentally threw ourselves a little Super Bowl party last night. "Accidentally" meaning the attendance had a balloon effect, and suddenly there were 40 people trying to share 4 pairs of 3D glasses. No worries, we love our friends, and their friends, and their friends...and I always overmake chili anyway.

The game was really good (I hear, anyway...it was tough to get near the tv), and Springsteen's ballplant was even better, but I have to say the highlight of the entire event was Alison and Mark's attempt at making the recently famed "Bacon Explosion." Is this the first official food meme? They very gamely photographed the process:

First the bacon weave:

Then you squish a bunch of sausage on top of it, plus more bacon crumbles:

The sausage looked tense:

The you roll it on up:

The little bundle of joy:

Mark demonstrates the lid of the incubator:

unsafe practices:

Tada!! She's born:

Now imagine wrapping that thing up and carrying it to another burrough on the back of a motorcycle. It needs a sidecar!

Bunny wars

Upon further examination, I see that it's this bunny, from Fuck You, Penguin that truly deserves the "have you ever...really, have you ever" 2009 title.

Bunny BLAMMM!!




I mean...have you ever? Effing no, I'd say.

7 Scoops

Scoop 1: Rosie (Lucy Stoner?) was kind enough to share a photo from the Museum of Natural History last week, where she fell upon a fashion shoot amongst the stuffed animals. I appreciate things like this, i.e. the intersection of 17 year-olds in 35K wedding dresses and artist's liberal recreation of paleo-critters, born from the discovery of a thigh bone in Minnesota. Ahh Spring fashion issues.

model museum-goers
Originally uploaded by trixiebedlam

It's kind of pointless to guess what magazine this is for (of course I must anyway: Elle?), but the museum can't come cheap ($15 museum admission, but if you wanna see the butterflies it's $24 more?!), and who's got money to throw around these days? Domino folded yesterday, which is the last place I worked before I became a moderately successful sell-out. Moderately successful meaning I can pay my bills comfortably for the first time...um...ever. I'm going to think of 2008 as the year I learned how to dodge bullets. And moved to Park Slope. And you know what? I'm ok with that. Yuppies live gooood. They buy things like Scoops 2 through 7:






And who doesn't need 6 scoops? I know what you're thinking - the only scoop you really need is for cat litter, right? Well you know what? Stay in Bushwick.

Bunny Bonus

I don't mean to go all cute overload on you, but I came across this, and, like...have you ever? I mean really, HAVE YOU EVER??



I bet he'd be divine with a mustard sauce.